Katy Hamilton

‘It’s impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly,’ Jerome K. Jerome wisely observed, ‘unless one has plenty of work to do.’ I don’t know about anyone else, but this week I seem mostly to have been Not Doing Enough, despite the feeble protestations of my subconscious (sufficiently feeble that I have watched rather more television since Monday than I probably should admit to). So I have come to mull over my lack of productivity, and conjure it into a post. This is, I’m sure you’ll agree, a fine example of top-notch procrastination.

So. I have a fairly lengthy ‘to do’ list, as you might expect. It involves planning and writing programme and CD notes, lectures and chapter outlines; practising and putting together repertoire suggestions; reading and listening, and other things besides. Actually I have more than one ‘to do’ list to stop me looking at a single, mighty catalogue of jobs on the horizon and instantly succumbing to a nervous breakdown. But more on that in a moment.

Here’s the thing about being self-employed. The only person who can tell you what to do is you. You are your boss! It’s great! But then, it does also rather depend upon the kind of boss you are. Are you super-generous, writing in allowances for regular tea/cake/TV breaks across the working day? How long is the working day? Which days are you working days, come to that? Or are you the opposite, all meanness and self-discipline, allowing breaks only in case of physical collapse, and abolishing weekends on the basis that there is always more to get done?

For most of us, I would wager, both such bosses are present in our heads. The days vary according to the level of compromise achieved between our warring internal management. On an average day, Mean Boss, smiling but iron-fisted, prompts me to get on with my list of tasks and I willingly submit to prompting. At lunchtime, Nice Boss pats me on the head and allows me to watch telly or go for a walk. Once playtime’s over, Mean Boss ushers me back to my desk, and off I go again… and later, Nice Boss is sufficiently impressed with my progress that I can stop for the day.

(If you are seriously telling me that you’ve never ended up having conversations with yourself in this manner, you should probably leave now.)

I think perhaps this week, Mean Boss went on leave. Because all week, despite the growing list of tasks and a vague underlying sense of urgency that certain things need doing, I just… can’t. Not to the point of entirely grinding to a halt, but there’s been a lot of staring dumbly at the tasks I should be doing, and then going off to flop on the sofa with a novel instead. This is also the point when Teenager Me shows up, and whines a bit, and says things like, ‘But I always work so hard, and it’s not fair, and why shouldn’t I be allowed to do nothing this week?’. Which means that even Grown-Up, Earning A Living Me starts thinking, ‘She’s got a point… And the sun’s shining, after all… and the things on that list aren’t really urgent, are they…?’

So on this sunny Easter afternoon, I would like to offer the following advice about workloads, drawing together the wisdom of Mean Boss, Nice Boss, Teenager Me, Grown-Up, Earning A Living Me, and… you know, actual real people outside of my brain.

1. A to-do list is good. Most people are quite fond a list. Nothing like crossing something off when it’s done, and being able to see at a glance what other tasks are in store. Taking the time to write things down can also help you clear your mind of remembering or fretting about things, and help you relax and even sleep better. Keep a jotter next to your bed, just in case you suddenly think of something in the middle of the night, or use the dictaphone on your mobile. Whatever works best for you.
2. Knowing your task list is only half the battle – the other half is timing. I mentioned I had more than one list. That’s because I usually have multiple mini-projects going on at the same time, and it’s helpful for me to be able to see the length of time I have to get each thing done. So I also have a month-by-month sheet which includes all of my deadlines for programme notes, dates of lectures, and so on. At a glance I can see how many plates I need to get spinning and when.
3. Carrot, not stick. Most of us have plenty of guilt and self-loathing already, so continually punishing yourself for not doing enough is no good at all. Every time you get something done, that’s a great thing. I know people who award themselves smiley faces for every five things done, and collecting more than so many smiley faces earns them an afternoon off or a night at the cinema. I also know people who equate number of tasks achieved with spending allowance on a shopping trip. I spoke to one friend recently who derives pleasure simply from physically moving a task written on a post-it note from the left side of the wall (to do) to the right (done), and being able to see just how much she’s achieved.
4. Breaks are allowed. (See also my earlier post about freelance tricks of the trade on this one.) Even if you have loads to do, working from 6am til 10pm and seeing neither friends nor daylight does you no good. Take a break and have days off. Make sure both your Mean and Nice Bosses have been read the employment laws! You might be working at home at something you love, but you’re still working. If anyone starts the old moan about how it’s not really work because you like what you do, throw your drink over them and leave. Trust me, you don’t need them.

And last, but not least, listen to the wisdom of others. Like, for example, Jerome K. Jerome. After all, the man has a point. We all have plenty to do, pretty much all of the time. But isn’t it nice to know, every now and again, that the work is there mouldering on the desk, and you’re out sitting in the sun?

And now, if you’ll excuse me, I have nothing to be getting on with.